Pag naging tahimik ang mundo natin, doon mangungusap ang Panginoon. :)
First, I had been thankful God gave me this opportunity na maging guide sa Encounter God Retreat. :) Being a guide is a real responsibility. Mag-ga-guide ka ng isang young Christian into knowing God deeply. It happened last September 26,27, 28, 2014. Before that, something happened which totally broke me. It was amazing actually. Amazing how God breaks us to stand up and be strong enough for people who are experiencing brokenness far worse than what we have. I have the choice if I'll entertain the pain but I am guide. So, with God's grace and strength, nakayanan ko. Praise God.
Second, madami akong natutunan sa encounter. Kahit guide na ko, madami parin akong bagong natutunan. Ganun talaga si God. He is able to reveal to us new and meaningful revelations basta i-se-seek lang natin Siya. What struck me most sa Encounter is the thought na, being an earthly father is crucial. Dahil kung ano ang pagmamahal na naibibigay sa atin ng ating earthly fathers, malamang sa malamang ganoon din ang mafo-form nating image ng ating Ama sa langit. Kaya marami ang hindi maka-grasp ng malalim na love ni Lord dahil we never really experience that love among our earthly fathers. Marami ang walang maayos na father figure kaya marami rin ang hindi maintindihan ng maayos that God wants to father us. I am not saying that we should condemn or hate our earthly fathers for that. Actually that is a reason na mas lalo pa natin silang mahalin. For they, themselves, might never experience that love from their own earthly fathers. A rejected and broken spirit always have the tendency to pass what rejection and brokenness they have to people. In my case, I can't grasp the saying "Look at yourself the way God sees you" because I never really felt being beautiful in my father's eyes. And I had only the image of God as a provider because that was what I had from my earthly father. But God had already redeemed my heart and I love my father and I always pray that He will also know God. Bigla ko tuloy naisip na ipag-pray na maging pastor's wife. Hahahahahaha. Resounding amen! My point is, I want my future children to have someone who will show them what true fatherly love is. Matagal pa yun syempre and being a pastor's wife would entail huge responsibility. But if God would let me have a family, I would be blessed to have a pastor as my partner. :)
Third, all of my own brokenness dawned on me the moment I went home from the encounter. Maluha-luha 'ko habang nag-eemail sa isang kaibigan. Then, I prayed and read the Bible, and sang hymns and praises. I suddenly felt that comfort and encouragement from God. I believe God is all the more teaching me how to be strong and add more faith to my basket of faith.
Fourth, I am blessed to have spiritual family and friends who are there for me in prayers. Sila yung magiging mga paa mo everytime na hindi mo na kayang maglakad. Sila yung maniniwala pag hindi mo na kaya. Sila yung mag-eencourage sayo pag wala ng hope na natitira sa puso mo. I have the tendency to have depressions and I am blessed for God to gives me this bunch of beautiful people to help me out through tough times.
In the middle of crazy world that we have, having a moment of silence with God is a treasure one must not let go. I pray, that you dear reader, would also experience that quietness from God. He is the still small voice in our hearts at maririnig lamang natin Siya pag naalis ang lahat ng kaingayan sa mundo natin. And I am thankful for this silence because my heart had been able to hear what He wants me to ponder on. I pray you would also have that intimate and quiet moment with God. :) God bless you!
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