Today’s a bit different. October 12, 2014, Sunday. Ang dami
kong nasa isip at hindi ko alam kung papano i-o-organize. Anyway, we are so
blessed to have Rhea in the worship celebration. Too bad wala akong picture kasama
siya. Rhea is my brother’s classmate and it is indeed a blessing having her
today. :) As I have heard, this kid had gone miles in dealing with what
problems life and school gave her. But I guess, she’d finally found her peace
of mind and refuge in the Lord today. :) I pray na mag-grow pa siya into
knowing who God really is. :)
What I wanted to share today are the answers to the problems
that I had been sulking on. The worship ended around 11:00 pm. May activities
pa ang church sa hapon and I am contemplating kung babalik pa or hindi. The
activities include our PEPSOL or Sunday School. Pinag-iisipan ko na hindi na
bumalik dahil tapos na ko sa Sunday School. So in short, wala naman na akong
gagawin. But aside from the Sunday School, may seminar na paunang ginagawa and
this seminar is for the whole congregation. Gusto ko sanang puntahan iyon. Pero
umiral ang kung anong katamaran. Umuwi ako ng bahay around 12:00 noon to eat
lunch. I was thinking to follow-up
several people instead of going back sa church. Dahil tanghaling tapat,
napakataas ng araw and bigla kong naisip na ang hirap kasi maglalakad lang ako
to their houses.
There is where the problems came in.
I’ve dwelt on the negative. Biglang sumagi sa isip ko na
nakakapagod ‘tong ginagawa ko. I’ve been following-up people na naglalakad
lang. I can ride but it wont be practical. So, in short, naisip ko yung lahat
ng pagod and effort ko into discipling people and I am into this point na
napapagod na ko kasi wala akong nakikitang results. Like, parang ako nalang
yung nag-eeffort, walang nakikitang changes sa kanila, mauubusan na ko ng
funds, ‘tas sila pa yung hindi nasunod, tataguan ka pa, blah, blah, blah.
“Lord, hanggang kelan ba ‘to na ako nalang lahat? Hanggang kelan po ba na
babalik balikan ko sila?” Ayun. Reklamadora mode on. Naisip ko pa, ang tagal
kong hinintay ‘tong point kung saan magkakaroon na ko ng disciples pero nung
nagkaroon na nga, hala, ang hirap pala. :(
Hindi ako natuloy sa pag-fo-follow up. I then saw myself
going back to church that time. Bumalik nga ako but aside from my back pack, I
carried with me the luggage of my problems.
But God is so amazing. He did let me come to church so I can
hear His answers to all of my questions.
It was specifically in SOL 2 where I got my answers. SOL 2
or School of Leaders 2 is a part of our Sunday school where the students are
already cell leaders or are already capable to be one. Tapos na ko sa Sunday
School but I can always sit in. So God used the teachers to show me my answers
and here are they. First, nahihirapan ako kasi sa simula palang wala akong goal
sa disciples ko. Hindi ko talaga malalaman kung hanggang kelan kasi walang
clear na goal and plans on how could I reach my goals. And the goal of G12 is
to make every believer a leader. I should goal that my disciples are becoming
leader themselves. Ang kaso cell group ako ng cell group, follow-up ng
follow-up, na wala naming sinusunod na plano. So parang I’m doing this thing
endlessly. Kailangan ko rin na magfocus na sa tatlong disciples na potential
leaders at i-close cell ko na sila. And the rest na makulit, open cell.
But this what struck me the most. If we are motivating
people, we must make sure that us leaders are well-motivated by God. That we
should not let God’s battery on us be depleted kasi pag hinayaan natin iyon at
nagpatuloy tayo sa gawain ng Panginoon, ang sarili na nating lakas ang
gagamitin natin. Kasi ‘yung dapat na source natin naubos na. Pag nangyari iyon,
mapapagod talaga tayo. Hindi naman talaga nauubos ang strength na kayang ibigay
ni Lord. We just ran out of it pag tayong mga leaders wala nang matinong
intimate moments kay God. Wala ng devotions and prayers. Hindi na
nagpa-recharge kay God at ang sariling lakas na ang ginamit.
And it is not true na kapag sinusugod na tayo ng kaaway or
anumang pumipigil satin into continuing God’s work, titigil narin tayo into
ministering peole. We can always fight our own battles while pursuing the work
God gave us. There is where we can also see God’s grace and mas lalalim ang
faith natin. Makakaya natin all because of faith in God’s faithfulness and grace.
I am also inspired to read the whole book of Nehemiah. Ang daming pwedeng
makuhang insights and inspiration on how they rebuilt their wall. And connected
talaga ang book ni Nehemiah sa discipleship.
I was really recharged. And thank God for this day. I can
say that God indeed is patient on each one of us. And as long as we really seek
Him with all our hearts, mahahanap natin Siya. (Jeremiah 29:13) Sa part ko, I
sought Him with all my heart in regards to ranting Him all my problems. And
hindi naman Niya ko binigo.
Naalala ko rin yung devotion ko for today. Noong una akala
ko wala lang. ‘Yun pala, pinapaalala sakin ng Lord that I am a chosen
generation and I am set apart to do great things for Him.
“Datapwat kayo ay isang lahing hinirang, mga saserdote ng
Hari, isang bansang nakatalaga sa Diyos. Pinili kayo ng Diyos upang maging
Kanya at mahayag ang kahanga-hangang gawa Niya. Siya rin ang tumawag sa inyo
mula sa kadiliman tungo sa Kanyang kagila-gilalas na kaliwanagan.” (1 Peter
2:9)
His promises are true. And dahil Siya ang nangako, sure
tayong tutuparin Niya ‘yun at Siya ang magdadala sa akin doon. He never
promised an easy way but He did promise that He shall be with me until the very
end. :) Being a cell leader and discipling people is really difficult. But once
you experience the joy of seeing people’s lives changed all because of God,
lahat ng hirap worth it. Kasi at the end of the day, God can tell you are
indeed a good and faithful servant. And being an instrument God can use to
change lives is a very wonderful and exciting journey sa buhay natin dito sa
lupa.
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| My PLMCI Family. Photo courtesy of Pastor Rey. This photo is dated October 5, 2014. |
So God bless everyone! See you at next post! :D
